Published: June 27, 2008 12:55 pm            

Larry Penkava - June 25, 2008

“We find ourselves guilty, your honor.”

That was the only verdict an Australian jury was allowed to deliver after five of them, including the foreman, admitted to playing Sudoku during a drug trial. Judge Peter Zahra stopped the proceedings after the three-month trial had cost Aussie taxpayers nearly $1 million (US).

“Some of the evidence is rather drawn out,” one of the culprits said, “and I find it difficult to maintain my attention the whole time.” Another said playing the puzzle, which involves completing a grid of numbers in sequence, helped to keep her “mind busy.”

Ironically, the constant scribbling in the jury fooled the judge and lawyers for a while. They thought the Sudoku players were busily taking notes on the trial.

“We actually thought they were quite a diligent jury,” lawyer Robin Hakelis said. “The judge had made many comments about what a good jury they were, how they were taking copious amounts of notes.”

Kind of takes you back to high school, right? We’d be back there playing tic-tac-toe and the math teacher thought we were teaming up to do algebra problems.

Those Australian jurors aren’t any different from most of us. They’d rather play Sudoku than listen to boring testimony.

I’ve never played Sudoku. Give me a good crossword puzzle any day.

A crossword is what got me in hot water once in college. I had the student newspaper folded to the crossword page stuck under my notebook, sneaking peeks when I thought my journalism professor wasn’t looking.

Unlike my high school math teacher, however, my prof was much more in tune with student stealth. He caught me red-handed and let me know about it.

“Mr. Penkava, if I can give you the answer to the word you’re working on, will you put up your crossword puzzle?”

Playing into his hands, I respectfully read him the toughest clue in the puzzle. Without a moment’s delay, he spouted out the answer, which I dutifully wrote into the boxes before closing up the paper.

I wonder if the guilty Australian jurors were as red-faced as I was when their deeds were found out. Their offense was discovered when they were observed writing notes vertically rather than horizontally.

Fortunately for them, it’s not a crime to do puzzles while sitting in the jury box so they face no penalty. It’s likely that, instead, they’ll be tried in the press.

Meanwhile, the two men charged in the drug case, who face possible life sentences, will see their trial begin afresh, once a new jury is called. Those in the jury pool should expect to be frisked for puzzles.

As for me, I can take solace from the knowledge that my ever-vigilant professor was at least as enthusiastic about crossword puzzles as yours truly.



Larry Penkava, who has written Now and Then since 1994, is looking for a four-letter word for “oops.”

        

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